Feel Good Drag
by crazyemosrock
Summary: “You were with him the night he died, weren’t you?” It caught Axel off guard.-- Like the devil's got your hand. BL AxR Slight AxS


"When I found out what happened, I was devastated, even more so because I hadn't heard until this morning."

There was a brown haired teenager up at the podium and he was talking about Roxas. He was talking about him and saying something about how he didn't hear until it was too late. Of course he didn't, because he hadn't been with him when it happened. He hadn't been the one to watch it happen.

Axel turned away from the dreary crowd of mourners, choosing instead to stand apart from them. After all, he was nothing like them and they had nothing in common, except this recent death.

"…it was sudden and it made me…"

God, that guy was still talking? He looked over to see what was happening. The teenager's throat must've been all tight because he stopped talking, opting to breathe deeply instead. Another person, a blonde man, rushed up to his side and walked him away from the microphone. Axel scoffed and headed towards his car, in a vain attempt to leave.

"Wait." He kept walking, stuffing his hands in his pocket, with his head down. He couldn't stay any longer. "Hey, wait." There was that voice again. Axel sighed and slowed to a stop, glancing over his shoulder at the voice.

"Huh?" It was the teenager from the funeral, the one with the long eulogy. He had run to catch up to Axel and he was breathing slightly harder than he had been at the podium. Facing him Axel watched as he caught his breath and tripped his way closer.

"I noticed you- at the funeral I mean." He said, struggling to get the words out. Of course he had seen him, who hadn't? It was one of the many negative things about his hair; you could pick him out of a crowd of a hundred people. "You, you're Axel." He spoke, jabbing a finger at Axel.

How did he know his name? No one at that funeral was supposed to know his name, because he had asked Roxas not to tell his estranged family about him. "Yes, yes I am." He replied, turning his back and continuing to his car. Like earlier, he had nothing in common with this guy and he needed to get back anyways. Some of Roxas's things were still in his apartment and he needed to get rid of them, and fast.

Just as he reached his car, he felt a hand on his arm. That was when the gloomy clouds split and rain began to fall. "I asked you to wait." It was the brunette again, and he was giving Axel that urgent look that he used to see so often. He then noticed that this relative had the same exact eye color as Roxas, as though they were brothers. Roxas didn't have brothers, he told himself. He didn't have immediate family.

"Okay. Just get in the car and we can talk." He found himself telling the teen, pulling his door open and shaking out of his grip. The rain was getting heavier and he slipped into the car, locking the doors after the brunette. "What did you want to talk about?" He asked, turning the key in the ignition to warm up the car.

The brunette held his breath before saying it. "You were with him the night he died, weren't you?" It caught Axel off guard and his eyes widened as soon as it registered.

"How do you know that?" He questioned him, narrowing his eyes and gripping the steering wheel a little too tight. He waited for an answer, flexing his fingers. "How do you know that?" He repeated, looking over at the stranger in his passenger seat.

"I don't know. All I know is what he told me, and that was that you two were together. There was more but this is all that's relevant." He responded quietly, his hands brushing water off of his suit pants to keep busy. "I just wanted…wanted a chance to talk to the last person that saw him alive."

Oh god. This kid was going to cry in his car and Axel couldn't have that. He felt the grief and the pain from the absence of the blonde too, but he couldn't cry about it. "Look, if you want to know then I'm just going to be straight with you." He told the kid, wishing he knew his name. "I--"

"Sora." Axel looked over at him, mouth open in midsentence. He kept his gaze to his lap and away from Axel as though he knew what his eyes did for him. "It's my name."

Axel returned his eyes to the front of the car. "Okay, yeah. Sora." He said, trying the name before resuming his earlier comment. "I was his boyfriend, got it? I hate how everyone says 'with him' like we're just friends." He muttered, losing his train of thought.

Realizing he was mumbling about nothing in particular, he racked his brain for what to say next before finding something. "Uh, this next part is kind of hard for me to say." Kind of hard for him to say? This kid's speech patterns were rubbing off on him. "I saw it happen. I saw the aftermath." He paused, letting this sink into Sora's thoughts. "I was the only person they had to identify the body." He added on, voice wavering.

There was silence and he was definitely not going to break it. "Okay then. That's all I wanted to discuss with you." Sora said, reaching up to unlock his door. Axel had it unlocked within a second of his hand reaching it. Taking a good look at Axel again, he pushed the door open. It was hard to explain the next part.

"Wait, Sora." There Axel went again, saying things out loud. "Just close the door. Please." The flustered brunette closed the door and settled into the seat. "Do you feel like going for coffee?" He asked him, changing gears and pulling out onto the street, away from the depressed people. Sora nodded; there was nothing else he could really do.

"Um, Axel. Do you mind if I use the phone?" He asked him, sliding a cellular out of his pocket. Axel nodded and kept his eyes on the road; the rain was falling harder. Sora dialed and lifted the phone to his ear, listening to the dial tone before someone picked up. "Hey Kai. Yeah, yeah I'm good now. Uh huh."

Axel glanced over at him; Sora's hand was curled around the phone, holding it close to his ear like it was his lifeline. "Okay, I'll see you when I get there." Pause. The cars tires sprayed gravel onto the sidewalk as Axel pulled into a parking space; the car idled. Garbled words come through the little speaker. "Yes, I love you too." Sora said into the phone. His voice was a little stronger now that they were long gone from the graveyard. Axel felt like he shouldn't have been listening, this was a private conversation, but it wasn't like he could just will his ears to not work, right?

He put the car in park and took the key out of the ignition, stepping out of the car to give Sora some privacy; after all, the kid kind of did deserve it when Axel stopped to think about it.

They sat in his damp apartment later, sharing memories of Roxas over their coffee with melted cream. When they sat in the dark for a minute or two, saying nothing, Sora stood and told Axel that he needed to go. Axel didn't say anything; he just sat and stared into his empty paper cup. He was glad Sora didn't ask to meet him again; he would've said no at a chance like that, because talking to Roxas's kid brother was too much for him and he told himself this over and over. All he needed was another cup of coffee to warm him up and a Tylenol to sleep on. Everything would be over when he forgot.


End file.
